Hey loves! <3 Hope you’re feeling great!
How I found out I was pregnant.. firstly even when I bought the test I thought there was no way, it was kind of just a routine check, buying the cheapest one’s from Clicks because obviously it’s going to be negative because I’m on the pill, but I just wanted to clear my mind of the chance that I might be because my period was late. I was on the pill and tracking my period on an app and my period was usually always 1 or 2 days early so I always told my friends I never had pregnancy scares because even before I could start worrying my period has already started. So when it was 3 days late I started to worry a little bit, but I had no other symptoms. I showed J.D. the app that my period was 3 days late and his reaction was, “why are you showing me this” and then I said I’m going to Clicks, which was me telling him I’m going to get a test. He did not get the hint AT ALL. So I go to Clicks, go buy it, buy the cheapest one, don’t think anything of it, come back home, and go straight to the bathroom to take the test. Within a few seconds a faint line started popping up and I think I blacked out after that.
J.D. was working at his desk, thank goodness for lock down that he was here but I just screamed and called him. He came immediately and I think when he saw me standing in the door he finally clicked what was going on and what I was trying to hint at earlier in the day. He just got the biggest smile and looked so excited. I think my reaction was “what are you smiling about, this is a disaster” haha and he just said, I’m old enough, I’m 30, it’s fine… with THE biggest grin.
I still didn’t believe it and was sure it was a mistake, so that evening I took another one, positive again. I was still in disbelief. Next morning went to Checkers and got the clear blue one that’s a bit more expensive and tells you how many weeks you are and yip, straight away it said pregnant 2-3 weeks I think.
Actually typing this now at 16 weeks only feels real, everything so far has just felt like a dream and like a blur. I think I was more emotional the first few weeks than excited, but also so terrified of getting excited and then it doesn’t work out. So I think all the way up to 12 weeks I didn’t allow myself to get excited or emotionally attached for the fear of having my dream ripped away from me. I honestly think I believed for a while that this will be a miscarriage. There was no way that me, that had so many hormone issues/lack of hormones, barely ever had a normal period, was sure I would never be able to have children or would struggle to fall pregnant could fall pregnant like this, without trying and have everything work out. There was just no chance…